Today a coworker made a complete fool of me during, what must be, one of the stupidest im conversations I've ever had in my entire life. He basically had me eating out of his hands, and I was none the wiser. He fed me this ridiculous elaborate story about how he was liked bowhunting. Do YOU know what bowhunting is? Exactly. You can't fault me for believing him because I had no clue WTF he was talking about. I just thought it was another one of those cracker hobbies, so I was just being my normal nosy self and started asking all these questions.
So after this a-hole confessed to making the whole damn thing up, I went back and read parts of our conversation. It was so hilarious, my sides were hurting. I am a complete moron, end of.
I'm going to put out some choice excerpts from my conversation with him (further supporting the me = moron theory), but first I need to premise this by saying 1. I had no idea about anything he was talking about, and 2. I really was genuinely interested in learning about this. So naturally, I believed EVERY WORD he said.
"It's hard tho, you have to get them with an arrow through the heart or their adrenaline/fear ruins the venison."
me, "So do you ever practice your archery around here?" him, "It's hard, not many places, I mean there's the santa monica archery club. But I can't afford to. I just keep practicing my form right while I watch tv."
me, "So you have bows and arrows and everything!?" him, "Well it wouldn't make much sense to have bows and not arrows."
"Man if you heard some of the stories Rip tells. It was a different frontier back then, lemme tell you" (whilst talking about his 88 year old German bowhunting friend).
"He once took down a cougar with a longbow, not one of these fancy graphite bows with the quadrupenal titanium action."
"A deer blind. You're up in a tree. Hiding. Waiting for one to come by in a place you think they'd be."
"So to get one deer in 10 tries is amazing. I've gotten 2 in 10. That's why the group calls me 'slayer.'"
"It was a junior bowhunting trip, a bunch of overexcited 16 year olds losing their hunting cherry."
me, "So you actually sit in front of the television and practice aiming? What do you roommates say to you when you do that." him, "Just pulling back the bow, maintaining tension and focus. He's chill with it. He knows better than to mess with a guy with a bow and arrow."
And then the question that brought his stupid ass game to a screeching halt: me, "So back to sitting in that tree. What do you do when you're waiting there... do you wait for hours?" him, "K. This was all a joke. A big fat joke. A joke that was so funny I couldn't stop... Feel free to hate me."